Premature Ejaculation

Hey there,

Got this link off a reader called Arbie from a previous posts and it stars US funny man Dave Chapelle talking about Premature Ejaculation http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zpjq8jqrPq8 See if you like it…?

Chapelle also does one of the funniest things I’ve ever seen on his Chapelle Show – ‘I’m Rick James’ do search YouTube people for it as its brilliant. It’s weird though my male friends love the sketch whereas my female ones just don’t seem to get it - Men are from Mars and Women Venus as stated on the tin. Just must be Mars is obviously a funnier place ;-)

I was just thinking today after stumbling across something in a men’s magazine and it involves one of the last girls I slept with and to be blunt and to the point -What the hell actually is a fanny fart? I mean just looking on the net now there are pages dedicated to this phenomenon. The Urban Dictionary calls one an: ‘involuntary expulsion of air from the front passage in females. Can occur during intercourse, or inverted yoga postures.’

I mention this as it’s just that I was in bed with this rather nice young lady and as she got more and more excited, the wetter she got, but the nosier she got in more ways than one. The gurgling and almost burping like qualities of her pussy became rather noticeable, probably a bit too noticeable for my weak constitution. And it wasn’t just like one of those silent but violent offences everyone commits, these were full on cross-channel ferry BarrrppppppppppppppPPPPPPSSSSSS! I’ve literally heard nothing like it before, or after. Saying that I’m actually remembering once a girl, who shall remain nameless, fell asleep after a rather intoxicated evening and let out this, I presume, real fart that was quite underwhelming in it’s noise, but the longevity of it was lending itself to Olympic standards of time busting. I’m still friends with this girl and wondering whether, or when the right time to bring this up would be. If I should at all…? – Answers on a postcard please.

I’m tending to think that I’ve had my fair share of bedroom talking points over the years but this, I guess, is another to add to the growing list. Normality please…. but what’s normal you may say you check that this is a blog dedicated to premature ejaculation! 

Anyway, that’s it for another week, enjoy the sun today…while it lasts.

Craig x

Well hello there….

I know, I know, it’s been a while in more than one sense of the word let me tell you, or not as the case may be! I have been in the process of moving flats and a new broadband connection has proved quite a hurdle to overcome. Anyway, it’s all sorted now and you can now sleep well in the knowledge that I’m back in business.

The lack of the information superhighway has allowed me to take a look at the fact that I do need it like a sort of drug. It’s such a great invention especially sites like Facebook and Hotmail in helping you keep track of things like parties, reunions, and news. But also for PORN. I know a lot of the readers of this blog are women and I was wondering what are your thoughts on this now easily accessible form of entertainment? I think with the ubiquity of scantily clad men and women on the net, splashed across magazines, tabloid newspapers and filling the screens of TV and film - porn has become far less a taboo subject than say 10-16yrs ago, when I was a wee lad.

For example if I mentioned the P word to one of my earlier, say teenage girlfriends they would run an absolute mind and think I was some weirdo freak. Which some may say is not far off the truth – haha! Whereas my previous girlfriend used to watch probably as much, if not more, scantily clad ass as I did. And I say ass in the female sense of the word, because she liked the lesbian stuff. I personally think she’s a closet lesbian, well I would after she broke up with me on New Years Day! Oh and she used to play football as well, another pointer to me perhaps the clearest of the lot. Although she did mention the first thing she was going to do was hook up with this hot girl at work and get her drunk. Hmmmmmmm

Anyway, lesbian porn which for me is all very very well, but there’s a beginning, a middle, but never any real ending is there? I always think it needs a bit of a male coming in at the end (literally) to conclude the scene properly at the very least. Preferably a muscular tradesman, like a plumber, or mechanic and preferably with a little moustache and talking in a Scandinavian accent – for authenticity naturally. I’m getting carried away now 

I don’t know I was just thinking, thinking that I’ve missed the red hot action like an old friend and now we’re back re-united I shall never let that sweet sweet electronic love go away for so long ever ever again.

Anyway, I’m off to watch YouPorn in an attempt to get a good nights sleep – after all tomorrow is another day in which I need to buy a TV…well I’ve got quite a few DVDs as well 

Take care folks.

Craig x