Posts archive for: June, 2008
  • PREMATURE EJACULATION: It’s always the quiet ones!

    Hola team,

    Well as I stupidly mentioned in my last blog that summer was here, well it looks like it’s just gone again. The weather it seems is going mental and surely as Al Gore says it’s got to be of our doing. You only have to read about the current flooding in China and the US today in the paper, problems. Anyhow, I’m not here to go all Swampy on you, but perhaps we should all think about turning the light off, boiling exactly what we need in the kettle and showering just once a week - haha!

    Anyway cutting back to the bone, I was in a steamy encounter this weekend with a rather nice girl, Gemma who in fact is a primary school teacher. Bright, quiet and well spoken/educated herself. Man is she just the opposite in bed and out of it – the things that were coming out of the ladies mouth! She is now bombarding me with text messages, and MMS pictures telling me what she wants to do with me and me to her! One minute she’s saying how lovely, how rewarding it is, bringing on the youth of today, next she’s regressed into some gibberish debauchery telling me how fcuking wet she is thinking about me going down on her in a hot shower as I also played with both her erm..holes, stuck things in here, there and anywhere! Well I’m quite shy, in some respects, and this got me thinking about the allegedly quiet ones.

    For example a couple of years ago I was travelling in NZ and after an horrific journey of miles and miles without seemingly seeing anything, or anyone. We pulled up late at this small coastal town and both me and my travelling chum were going to go straight to bed after a quick shower (yep thought we’d better it had been an a/c free vehicle shall we say!) but I persuaded him to go to the local bar for a quick relaxing jar. And thank god we did.

    Perhaps it was because we were in the middle of nowhere, and it was warm (greenhouse effect again you see!) but it was like Take-That had walked in and we were (unusually) surrounded by some very chatty/forward girls. After one or two beers more than expected, I ended up with this young, pretty German who suggested, well I did, that we go back to hers. Her friend drove and we all ended up in bed together, though her friend pretty much crashed out asleep. Before you know it, said Herman was stripped off, stripped me off and was sucking away like a trouper, boom that was it for me as ever! Then I noticed and this by the way this 18yr old girl, had her clit pierced! I’ve never seen anything of the sort, call me naïve, but 18?! anyway she played with herself, I played with her, some of the toys she had brought (travelling?! How she gets them through customs etc, god only knows) and she was going crazyyyyyyy. Quite what her friend was thinking god only knows, but she went to sleep on the couch out of necessity in the end. The cutest, nicest young European girl. Filthy! Needless to say the Sharpshooter was sharp that night, which I got the feeling she wasn’t overly impressed with. Great night non-the-less.

    The fact that I had to be up in the morning to watch some whales, dolphins etc - the whole reason for driving that far, was lost on me as I sat just looking at the sexy youthful bronzed body beside me. Not so much my friend however, who was up and running back at our hotel at the crack of dawn waiting to go see Free Willy and friends, which we never actually managed to do due to my late arrival back. Oops. Ahhhh, those hazy crazy lazy travelling days.

    Until next time people! And do feel free to comment on any filth you want to share – about the quiet ones 

    Craig x


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  • PREMATURE EJACULATION: We're all going Orange

    Hi All,

    Firstly, thank you to a reader who has syndicated me into his PE website, all this helps us who have been afflicted by the curse of being a bit too hot off the blocks!

    Well the summer it seems is finally here for at least a couple of days – infact sometimes when the sun shines is there anywhere better in the world than the UK?…the answer is still yes! But, I’m not complaining for once I am a summer bunny and a happy one at that at present! :D

    I see the Euro’s are well underway, and regular readers will note I’m a huge football fan. I can never seem to quite relate as well particularly guys who don’t like say football, rugby, cricket, tennis or one of the major rough and tumble sports. Any other blogger fans find that?, or is it me just being one dimensional?? – Because I assure you I’m not! Anyhow, I’m going to support the Dutch I think, with the absence of those over paid British pre-Madonna’s that litter the Premiership. My money is looking good after they turned the World Cup holders Italy over in their first game. ¡Hup Holland!

    Pretty quiet on the S E and X front of late, so I’ve got a list of humorous retorts to partners who are less then helpful with my little problem, five more next month if I get some good feedback.

    1) "My pants have been too tight all day and the sudden release of pressure caused major upheaval in my groin."

    2) "You were just far too sexy, babe."

    3) "I was jetlagged and still running an hour behind."

    4) "A bedspring jabbed me in the ass, RIGHT in the g-spot, would you believe."

    5) "I have COWS - Constantly Over-stimulated Willie Syndrome. It's a true medical condition. Check my . . . I mean, check the entry in Wikipedia.

    Speak soon peop’s…

    Craig x

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